A bit of a dilemma

My children do not like to eat very many things.  They don't like tofu.  They don't like any bean or any dish that a bean is in.  Z1 will tolerate burritos or tacos made with black beans but not Z2.  They both will tolerate split pea soup but not without some serious cajoling.  It seems all they want to eat are fish sticks, broccoli, pizza, grilled cheese, or macaroni and cheese, and yogurt (but Z1 not so much).  It drives me crazy because I think they eat too much cheese but it's what they like.  And granted, the cheese I give them comes from grass-fed cows and all that but still . . . 

So I don't know.  I'm feeling totally better after switching back to an all-out omnivorous diet.  I have not given the kids any chicken, turkey or beef.  My idea was that they could decide later on if they wanted to eat those things.  But I don't know now.  They're growing fine and are hitting all their milestones.  I'd say they are well-nourished but I worry and I wonder would they be more willing to eat things like grilled or stir-fried chicken or turkey burgers as opposed to grilled or stir-fried tofu and veggie burgers.  

I'm writing this after another failed attempt at dinner.  Tried a new dish in hopes that they'd like it:  it's a peanut sweet potato stew with kidney beans from Vegan Planet.  I tasted just a little and I think it's delicious especially with rice.  Initially, I was going to make sweet and spicy chili from the same cookbook but I already knew it would be a fail.

Photo credit

Saul Williams

Is one of my favorite spoken word artists.  Also, I loved him in "Girlfriends" as Lynn's celibate boyfriend.  :)

Saul Williams       (during a rap slam practice at the Portland Nationals) 

Whish-shhhh, whish- shhhh, whish- shhhh … 

If I could sample the wind I would loop it and 

let my life poem flow over its sacred beats. 

Using Kilamenjaro as my jembe I would drum rainbows 

out of the moonlight and use them as hooks in between verses. 

Verses of little girls spinning ropes in opposite directions 

waiting for an opening to jump in. 

As the world turns double dutch 

I jump double time over oceans and back 

the water waves and I wave back  

awakening echoes of sunshine, 

folks get ‘round in the sunshine, 

but the lightening FLASH three times and it’s time for the course 

which includes cornbread, candied yams, and all that good stuff, 

which black folks and Saturn are made of. 

As we approach the second verse 

the roots of trees are plucked from baselines 

which resonate and shake the earth 

devastating everything that’s not built in harmony in it. 

The second verse is a journey through the ruins 

of ruined souls that valued all that was nothing 

and nothing of the all-knowing, ever-flowing wind 

which is the undercurrent of this current 

blowing the funky drummer from here to eternity. 

But even as ruined souls back spin 

the wind mills forward and rocks steady till the sun 

hits the fader and the chorus kicks in then 

the moon yells, “Go!” and we all back spin, “Zulu!!” 

as the moonlight shines true blue silvery indigo light 

my spirit takes flight because the indigo moonlight is my endo, 

indigo, indigo-on-to-the-break-of-dawn, 

rock, rock steady steady to the early morn’, 

Word is born. 

I’m talking about seeing your nature 

in nature and nature in your nature, 

New York states of mind did not create ‘cha, 

neither ‘til you listen to rock hear mine care mine 

a rocky mountain top if you heard hip hop. 

It’s graduated urban an element that created it and 

let and open-wide countryside illustrate it. 

Riding in a freight train, listening to Coltrane 

my reality went insane and I think I saw Jesus. 

He was playing hop-scotch with Benny Carter 

who was cursing him out in a Scat-like gibberish 

for not saying, “Butterfingers.” 

And God created sand like seeds of time, 

the pains of man the frames of mind which built these frames 

which is the structure of my urban superstructure. 

The trains and planes could corrupt and obstruct 

your train of thought so that you forget how to walk through the woods,  

which ain’t good, ‘cause if you ain’t never walked through the trees 

listening to nobody beats the biz then you ain’t never heard hip hop. 

And it don’t stop and it don’t stop and it don’t, 

stop letting cities define you, confine you 

to that which is cement and brick. 

We are not a hard peoples. 

Our domes have been crowned with the likes of steeples. 

That which is our being soars with the eagles and 

the Johnathon Livingston Seagles. Yes. 

I got wings. 

You got wings. 

All got wings. All God wings. 

So let’s widen the circumference of our nest 

and escape this urban incubator. You see, 

the wind plays the world like an instrument, 

blows through trees like flutes, 

but trees don’t grow in cement. 

And as heartbeats bring percussion, 

fallen trees bring repercussions, 

cities play upon our souls like broken drums. 

We drum the essence of creation from city slums. 

But city slums mute our drums. 

And our drums become hum-drum ‘cause 

city slums have never been where are drums are from. 

Just the place where our daughters and sons 

become off-beat heartbeats, 

slaves to city streets, 

where hearts get broken and heartbeats stop. 

Broken heartbeats become break beats 

for niggers to rhyme on top. 

But they rhyme about – nothin’. 

They don’t got nothin’ to rhyme about 

‘cause you’ve never seen the moon, your styles 

can’t be universal if you’re not in tune with the 

whish- shhhh, whish- shhhh, whish- shhhh.  

Text found here

It seems that a teacher had used this to teach about literary devices.  I think that would be brilliant and I would have loved to study Williams work as student.  

Last Completed Project of 2010

The last project I completed in 2010:

I used a bulky acrylic (?) yarn someone gave me a while back.  I love the color (green is my absolute favorite color--all shades).  I used an "N" hook and this pattern.  It was a quick, easy project worked entirely with triple crochets around posts. I think it came out nicely.  The only problem:  I have no idea where, when or with what I'd actually wear it.  If you think you could rock it, e-mail me and I'll send it to you.

I haven't really been focused on crocheting and knitting, at least not enough to purchase new yarns.  I'm just using up whatever is in my stash.  Maybe later on in the year, I'll get inspired.  I definitely want to try knitting myself a sweater with some luscious yarn and using an amazing pattern (suggestions welcome).  Maybe this is the  year for that.

Have you written down your goals?

One of my best friends and I are working on what we are calling, "Do Lists".  These are things that was need to do in this lifetime and we're not limiting it to 2010 although there are some things marked "urgent".  These things we'd like to see happen much sooner than later.

I'm not one to tell people how to go about keeping the promises they've made to themselves but I do believe this one thing: if you are serious about reaching your goals, you must write them down.  In detail.  Very specifically.  

So it's not, "I want to get fit".  No!  It's I want to

-be able to touch my toes

-jump rope for 30 seconds without stopping

-do 5 push ups

-run a mile in 15 minutes

It's not, "I want to have more friends" . . . it's I want:

-companions to knit with

-someone to cook with

-a book club to join that suits me

I think (and experience confirms) that this is the most effective way to achieve your goals.  Post your specific goals in highly visible places.  Or not.  Tuck it away in a diary or a book and refer to it periodically.  It makes such a difference to see what you are aiming for and to imagine it/visualize it happening as if it were happening.

"With our thoughts we make the world," said the Buddha.  I'm all about finding out if he spoke the truth.  And I'm starting with my list.  

Honey, I shrunk . . .

I went to the thrift store yesterday.  I needed to get out of the house.  I needed a break from the kids.  The thrift store was open . . . I went.  I found some great stuff too:

• a wool jacket for Z2
• a wool ear flap hat for Z1
• a wool turtleneck sweater for me (I'm getting back into turtlenecks after years of avoiding them because I had a "fluffier" bust)
• a pair of fleece pajamas for Z2
• a down filled Land's End vest (which would go nicely over the turtleneck sweater)
• a pillowcase I thought would fit my oddly shaped pillow (but won't)

I came home and tossed everything except the wool jacket and the pillowcase into the wash (I forgot the pillowcase).  I completely neglected to think about the water temperature and everything got washed on warm.  The wool ear flap hat and the sweater felted and shrunk.  I was crushed.  I still am.  I can't really place a finger on why it's bothering me so much.  I have accidentally felted things that I've made with my own hands and not been this upset.  I hope I get over it soon.

Meanwhile, I've been searching high and low for the second deck of the Kindergarten Brain Quest.  I don't know what the kids did with it but I do know I want to have a complete deck.  After days and days of searching and frustration, I'm just going to buy it again and relax about it.  After all, they have come out with a new edition.  I'm going to keep it out of their reach too.    Brain Quest is invaluable for long car rides and days when we are taking a break from the computer and the television.  I should never have left it in their room within their reach.

Maybe that's it . . . maybe it's a combination of things that is making me take the loss of the hat and sweater so badly.

Is it a sign that this is my first post of the year?  Something more upbeat later . ..