Finally got with the Diva

The Diva Cup, that is.  

I've been using cloth pads for years now and it's been really great.  The pads have held up well and I never had accidents or other issues with the majority of them.  All in all, I was very happy being "on the rag."  But I'd always wanted to give the Diva Cup a try because it just seemed like another great, natural and perhaps simpler way of catching menstrual flow. And so far, it has been.

This is the second cycle for which I have used the cup.  There is a bit of a learning curve and I am still getting the hang of inserting it properly.  But I am getting better and better.  If I insert it properly, I can be sure that it will not leak at all (even though I still wear a liner).  This is just *wonderful*.  One of the biggest issues with cloth pads are that they are bulky and they can be seen if I'm wearing leggings like I do to the gym.  Also, they absorb and hold on to not only menstrual blood but also sweat.  So for the past few months that I've been a member of the gym, I've been wearing regular disposable thin pads for working out.  I am just thrilled that the Diva Cup is a viable alternative in this particular instance!  The Diva Cup is also the perfect solution for the night.  It doesn't matter how much I toss and turn, I get no leakage.  

There are different styles of folding the cup for insertion.  I use the "punch down fold."  It seems to work best for me.  The trick is making sure that the cup is fully open when it is inserted.  

Basically, two or three times a day, I remove the cup, empty it, rinse it and re-insert it. In the morning, I will wash it with Dr. Bronner's castile soap (which rinses clean--you definitely don't want soap residue in your vagina).  It's definitely not as messy or gross as I had once imagined.  The main reason I didn't go with a cup when I was looking to make the switch from disposable pads was because of the "ick" factor.  But since I've been using cloth pads all this time, there is simply no "ick" factor when it comes to menstrual blood anymore.  Once my menstrual period is over, I boil it for a couple of minutes, let it air dry and store it in the little pouch in which it came.  

Because I mainly had cloth pads and very few cloth liners, I decided to purchase some.  I went on Ebay and found this seller and I am *so* pleased with these liners.  I can't recommend them highly enough.  They are quite thin--thinner than even disposable liners.  They are also very well made and, might I add, cute.  

So, I would say, I'm completely converted.  I like the comfort (you don't feel it at all) and I absolutely love less laundry.  I feel bad abandoning my cloth pads but who knows, I may come back to them at some point in the future.  

Look what we found in the trash today . . .

I'd been wanting one for the kids for a while now but I didn't want to put out the money. I'm not sure if it's sturdy enough for me to jump on but it's awesome for them.  

And a few weeks ago we found:

It was missing a wheel and the sides.  The hubby used a wheel from one of the many, many tricycles we have acquired and fixed it.  The kids do not mind at all that it doesn't have sides: they hold on to what they can and pull each other all around the yard. This is TONS of fun to them and a great way to burn all that energy they have.  

I'm always amazed at what folks throw out.  Hey, you know what they say about one man's garbage . . . 

When I moved into my current house (the house my husband grew up in until he was about 5 and then moved back into when he was 21).  I inherited a magnificent Magic Chef oven very similar to this one:

It was manufactured in 1958.  This stove was serious.  It was heavy.  The burners were pure cast iron--heavy.  It wouldn't light without matches (or some other kind of lighter).   It was seriously dusty in some areas like the broiler and the little side storage unit (that still had some of the hubby's grandmother's stuff in there).  The clock on the top didn't work.  The oven door was a trick door and wouldn't close all the way.  But I loved that stove.  A lot.  It was old school.  Strong.  And still working (somewhat) all these years later with minimal upkeep.  

The hubby found a used appliance place a few months ago and the place has economically furnished us with lots of reliable appliances to replace the ones we've had for years that have been partially working.  We got a Hotpoint stove very similar to this one:

It's not new new but it's new to me.  So far I'm pleased with it.  Maybe because after my Magic Chef, I didn't have anywhere to go but up.  I still pull out my lighter every time I want to cook.  And I need to look at the diagrams on the stove to know which burner knob belongs to each burner.  But I'm getting used to it.  

I find it so interesting the differences in how a 1950s stove and 1990s stove were produced.  The burners are so much lighter than my Magic Chef!  Still, I really like this new stove and I can't wait to use the broiler.

My kitchen feels so new.  The hubby replaced the floor tiles (peel and stick tiles have come some far) and a "new" kitchen table courtesy of the thrifts store.  I spend so much time in the kitchen.  It's nice to look around and see some beauty.  

On another note, I have been moving slowly to a paleo diet.  I read Mark's Daily Apple and I have read The Paleo Solution by Robb Wolf and this way of life/eating really seems to work for many and I suspect it will work for me.  Currently, I don't eat any beans, legumes, rice or wheat.  I still eat millet and oats though and every so often I indulge in Trader Joe's Gluten-free Ginger Snaps, Trader Joe's Salsa Chips and I love, love, love popcorn and really enjoy my plain Greek yogurt (with a touch of honey, strawberries, blueberries and a tablespoon of the hubby's Hemp Plus granola).  Still, having eliminated the things I have eliminated, I feel really good--better than I have felt in years.  And it shows with my skin which had turned dull and dry but is not supple and moisturized.  But Z2 has been really suffering with stomach  issues and it's making me think that he needs a change in diet too.  He loves breads and stuff but is not really into beans/legumes anyway.  So I bought the book Everyday Paleo by Sarah Fragoso and I'm really impressed.  I can't wait to try out some of the recipes.  It's going to be difficult doing paleo.  The hubby is a strict vegetarian and Z1 really doesn't like the idea of eating animals.  But if I can get Z2 and I to at least 85% paleo, I will be happy.  I just want to see what difference it can make for us.

Happy Thrifting!

For me, thrifting can be addictive and can get costly.  I reason that I'm saving money (and I am) but I need to really save money, that is not spend money.  So I made an agreement with myself to avoid the thrift store for three months, basically until mid to end of April.  I'm happy I kept my word to myself.

Yesterday, though, I ventured into the thrift store.  I only spent about $11.00 but I felt really happy about my purchases.  My main reason for going to the thrift store was to find a bag.  I needed something with lots of pockets and compartments.  It needed to a shoulder bag (when we go into the city, I usually carry Z2's stroller on one shoulder and my book-bag really makes it difficult).  I was disappointed when I couldn't find a shoulder bag but thrilled when at the last minute, I found the Skip Hop messenger style diaper bag and it only cost $3.99 although it retails for $80.  It's in excellent condition too.  Perfect.

 Box of Knitting Patterns, Crochet Book, pull out Dora the Explorer book--$3.00

 Cute tote/reusable bag perfect for carrying stuff for my crochet class--$1.00

 Wool Sweater--$2.00

So, a pretty good haul, I'd say.  And I won't be back at the thrift store for some time.  :)

Honey, I shrunk . . .

I went to the thrift store yesterday.  I needed to get out of the house.  I needed a break from the kids.  The thrift store was open . . . I went.  I found some great stuff too:

• a wool jacket for Z2
• a wool ear flap hat for Z1
• a wool turtleneck sweater for me (I'm getting back into turtlenecks after years of avoiding them because I had a "fluffier" bust)
• a pair of fleece pajamas for Z2
• a down filled Land's End vest (which would go nicely over the turtleneck sweater)
• a pillowcase I thought would fit my oddly shaped pillow (but won't)

I came home and tossed everything except the wool jacket and the pillowcase into the wash (I forgot the pillowcase).  I completely neglected to think about the water temperature and everything got washed on warm.  The wool ear flap hat and the sweater felted and shrunk.  I was crushed.  I still am.  I can't really place a finger on why it's bothering me so much.  I have accidentally felted things that I've made with my own hands and not been this upset.  I hope I get over it soon.

Meanwhile, I've been searching high and low for the second deck of the Kindergarten Brain Quest.  I don't know what the kids did with it but I do know I want to have a complete deck.  After days and days of searching and frustration, I'm just going to buy it again and relax about it.  After all, they have come out with a new edition.  I'm going to keep it out of their reach too.    Brain Quest is invaluable for long car rides and days when we are taking a break from the computer and the television.  I should never have left it in their room within their reach.

Maybe that's it . . . maybe it's a combination of things that is making me take the loss of the hat and sweater so badly.

Is it a sign that this is my first post of the year?  Something more upbeat later . .. 

Costco versus BJ's

This post might be useful if you're trying to decide between the two.  

I've been a Costco member for the past 2 years.  In that time, a BJ's warehouse store opened about 5 minutes from my house (right across the street from Fairway).  Now, Costco is not that far away but it is two towns over.  It would be wonderful if I could do all my shopping closer to home, i.e. at Fairway and BJ's (but still driving 3 towns over to get to Trader Joe's every other week).  So when my Costco membership lapsed, I decided to give BJ's a try.  I signed up for the 60-day trial membership to see if I could make a go of it.  

Here are some of the things Costco has but BJ's doesn't:

• organic brown rice
• Dr. Praeger's veggie burgers
• Flax Plus granola
• old-fashioned rolled oats
• organic peanut butter
• organic (low-sugar) strawberry preserves
• organic frozen corn and mixed vegetables
• organic soy milk
• Kirkland signature mesquite seasoning
• organic dried thyme, oregano and basil
• fish sticks (which are mostly fish and a very thin layer of breading)
• Kirkland toilet paper (which is awesome, by the way)

Some thingss that BJ's has going for it:

• the fruits and veggies are generally fresh (though not the last time I went) and many of the veggies are are sold in smaller quantities (Costco sells, I think, a 7# bag of organic carrots but BJ's carries a reasonable 3# bag)
• I really liked the layout of BJ's.  The aisles are all clearly marked so you don't have to walk down every aisle to find something.  Costco recently changed the whole store around and you couldn't find anything or anyone to ask--it was quite frustrating.  
• BJ's has self-checkout lanes which is great for getting in and out quickly. 
• My kids love the fact that they have those car shopping carts (which drive me insane with their inability to be maneuvered)

The first couple of weeks of the BJs trial membership, I thought I might try to have a membership at both places but I didn't think I could re-coup my membership fee.  Or maybe I could make BJ's work by plugging the holes with Trader Joe's.  I think  I decided against that particular option because:

• while Trader Joe's carries the Dr. Praeger's veggie burgers, they are smaller than the Costco ones and cost more per burger
• Trader Joe's fish sticks are smaller and cost almost two times as much as the ones carried at Costco.  
• Flax Plus is far more expensive at Trader Joe's than Costco

I'm disappointed in my local Costco because they stopped carrying organic quinoa and organic sugar.  I know I really should write a letter and maybe these two items will come back.  Despite my disappointment, it makes more sense to continue as a Costco member.  The fruits are not the worst (I stay away from their bananas though) and they have a nice organic spinach they carry.  Also, I mainly buy fruits and veggies at Fairway and Trader Joe's (only sometimes though because their produce is iffy although I can rely on their celery and lettuce being fresh) since I can get organics there (especially the Dirty Dozen.

I wish BJ's had worked out.  It would have been super-convenient.  I'm going to focus on only having to go far every other week (Trader Joe's and Costco one week and Fairway only the other week).  I don't want to drag the kids to three stores at every shopping excursion.  So I have to be smart about what and how much I buy. 

Do you have a wholesale club membership?  Has it worked out for you? 

The Joy of Thrifting Returns!

Now that I'm down to a size 6 (wahoo!!), shopping for clothes at the thrift store has become easy and exciting again.  While there have always been lots of clothes available no matter what size I was, at a size 6 not only are there plenty of options, there are plenty of cute options.  I've been able to get great skirts and capri pants; blouses and t-shirts to make up my summer wardrobe.  I would say I have not paid more than $50 for it all.  

Paradoxically, it's become harder to shop for clothes in my neighborhood (aka on the ave in the hood).  I've always been accustomed to buying tank tops and bike shorts or leggings (stuff for exercising or lounging at home that I wouldn't necessarily buy at the thrift store) for cheap on the ave.  Often times I can find merchandise that has "fallen off the back of the truck", i.e. name brand stuff that somehow ended up in these little stores.   A recent expedition to the ave to try to get some new bike shorts/leggings was totally unproductive.  Turns out that they either carry extra-small (like for pre-pubescent girls or really, really skinny women) or medium and up (to xxl).  No smalls!  So my go to for bike shorts/leggings is no longer my go to.  Which kind of sucks.  But whatever.  I'll pony up the $14 it costs to buy bike shorts at Target because exercising in pants in the summer is just . . . not nice.  

A great find and in interesting discovery

This will be one of those quick posts that smushes two topics into one. LoL.  

Okay, so firstly, look what I found:  

We went to a cherry blossom festival today in White Plains and as we were walking back to the car, we noticed it.  Being who I am, if something looks good, even if it is in the trash, I have no shame in stopping to check it out to see if it's there's any life left and/or if I can use it.  It so happens that this wonderful piece was in such good condition (along with the chair that was with it) that I figured someone had to be moving it somewhere.  So I checked it out, all the while, completely expecting the owner to come out at any moment.  Ten minutes.  15 minutes.  We started to load it up into the car.  I figured at this point if someone wanted it, they would say something.  No one showed up for it.  I wish I could have fit the chair in the car too because Z2 is outgrowing his high chair and we only have three kitchen chairs but it's okay.  This cupboard doubles my counter space and provides a heck of a lot of storage.  I'm thrilled about it!  I would be thrilled if I bought it full price.  That I got it for free is just so awesome.

Secondly,  this is the third week of weighing in where I have experienced weight gain  Granted, it's just a few ounces but it is no coincidence that my weight gain corresponds with starting P90X.  I want to say that it is just that I'm putting on muscle but I really think that the real reason is that I'm not doing enough cardio.  I feel more sluggish and I miss how good it feels to really move and sweat.  I'm moving into week four of the program which is a recovery week.  However, I am not recovering.  I'm going to do a good amount of cardio this week, a little weight training at some point, and one extra yoga session. I will be thinking about how to modify P90X to suit my needs.  The program requires 75 minutes or more on most days which makes it almost impossible for me to add 30-40 minutes of cardio daily.  So, I really have to figure out how to make the program work for me or I have to accept that it doesn't work for me at this time.  As luck would have it, just at the moment when I started to wonder about what to do, a friend of mine gifted me Insanity which is definitely more cardio based with weight training using only body weight.  I almost chose Insanity over P90X simply because it requires no extra-equipment.  One thing I do like about P90X is the use of the chin-up bar. since one of my goals this year is it be able to do at least one chin-up. 

I don't know . . . I'm looking forward to using my regular DVDs for this week.  I'm looking forward to feeling good after a sweaty, heart-thumping workout.  Perhaps I will gain some clarity while working it on out!

Hope you all had a fantastic weekend!

P.S.  The hubby says he saw the owner wheeling it out when we first arrived at the cherry blossom festival but thought that he was getting ready to load it up into his car or something.  Two hours later, as we were leaving, it was still out there.  Waiting for me!  Why the hubby didn't tell me that at the time, I will never know.  Gotta love the menfolks!

The only thing I have dreaded about losing weight . . .

 . . .  is having to get new clothes.  Currently, I'm a size 6 but most of my clothes are a size 12.  It makes me feel sloppy to have such baggy, ill-fitting clothes but I'm in a bit of a 4-way bind.  

Firstly, I know I do not want to go shopping with the kids.  Shopping with the kids means I won't be able to focus as much as I want and I will probably have to rush since they tend to have very little patience for clothes shopping.  

Secondly, I really don't know what my style is.  I know that I like certain things but I have absolutely no idea how to pull all those things together into a cohesive style.  I feel overwhelmed and intimidated by the thought of spending money on new clothes that I don't know exactly what to do with.  I mean, I had a style pre-kids.  Well, many various styles that corresponded to the phase I was in but back then I enjoyed shopping more and didn't mind spending hours scouring the racks.  Hitting the clearance racks at H&M and Macy's was a rush!   Well, while I'm not exactly sure of the style that's me, I do know a few things about myself.  That I like simplicity. Nothing too fussy.  I don't like accessorizing.  No big buckle belts or multi-layered ensembles.  Just classic kind of stuff with an earthy undertone--comfortable yet kind of chic.  Is that even a style?  How do I pull that off?   I honestly need maybe 5 bottoms and 5 tops.  I have one pair of really comfortable brownish colored Danskos and another pair of really comfortable black clogs.  I hardly ever choose any other shoes and that's why I don't have that many shoes to begin with nor do I want more shoes so the clothes I buy kind of have to go with the Danskos (or Birkenstocks in the summer). 

Thirdly, there's the money constraint.  I just renewed a subscription to my favorite magazine for 2 years.  It struck me that I could have used that money to get a few things but honestly, shopping these days is kind of stressful and elicits a lot of "Why in the hell is this so expensive?  It's not even 100% [insert natural fiber here]!"  I subconsciously feel I enjoy the use of the money more with some good reading material.  But I also know that I would really enjoy feeling like I look good in my clothes.  

I think I will go the thrift store route first but I'm going to wait until the hubby is on vacation and I can spend a couple of hours by myself and hit a few different thrifts stores.  If I have a good day, with $60 I could really clean up.  Forty dollars spent at TJ Maxx, Target or Marshalls should seal the deal.  For $100, I might acquire a decent wardrobe.  It would be a whole lot more fun and a whole lot less stressful if I had a girlfriend to go with.  It would be a kind of adventure maybe.  Let me tell you, the other day the simple fact that I can't find anyone to go shopping with was messing with me something awful.  Everyone is busy or lives too far away.  Heck, I'm too busy.  Schedules never mesh at all.  So I'm just sucking it up and looking around trying to find some kind of inspiration for the style I'm trying to achieve so that I at least know what to keep an eye out for.  I'm trying to eliminate the dread and build excitement.  It's kind of working. 

Photo Credit:  "New Clothes" by TarynMarie on Flickr.com

Great Score

Seventh Generation Baby Wipes

Usually about $3.50 per 70 count pack. Found two packs on the clearance rack at Super Stop and Shop for $1.15 each. That's $2.30 for 140 wipes. It will take me forever to use 140 wipes. I hope I don't have to ever buy another pack of wipes. That means I also hope Z2 learns to use the toilet soon. I believes in letting them go commando . . . that's the fastest way to help them get it! Oh, if the hubby weren't so squeamish! We'd have this done already.

. . . and all the shiny accessories

It's winter time and I drink much less water than I do in the summer time especially while I'm out and about. The other day I was on my way to work packing my lunch. I was getting ready to put my 40-ounce stainless steel water bottle into my bag and realized that it just took up way too much space in light of the fact that I didn't actually need forty ounces of water that day. I thought about what to do. I went to my cupboards and got out a 20-ounce plastic Rubbermaid bottle but I felt . . . funny. I remember feeling a similar way when I forgot my reusable bags for my groceries at Trader Joe's. I remember feeling a similar way hoisting out my mismatched hodgepodge of re-useable bags at the "upscale" Whole Foods.

"What's this?" I asked myself.

My mind flashed back to this article and I had myself a good chuckle. See, far too often, it's the shiny accessories that announce that one is living a green lifestyle that become most important. It's the highly visual evidence that one is not a mindless consumer but rather a consumer that puts careful thought into each of his/her purchases. It's the symbol that says, "I care about the Earth" and "I am doing something". Or so the merchandise would suggest.

I thought about buying a smaller stainless steel water bottle for myself. Maybe borrowing Z1's (after a good scrub down, of course). But I decided to take my little plastic Rubbermaid bottle. I was only putting plain water in it anyway and certainly not in the mood to spend any extra money. I already had something to carry my water in.

I'm not interested in the look of being green. And I'm especially not in it for all the shiny accessories.

Voluntary Frugality vs. Necessary Frugality

This season is one in which everyone thinks a lot about money.  I think even more so this year when the country is in the midst of a terrible recession (or depression by some accounts).  You hear the word "frugal" tossed around a lot too.  "This will be a frugal Christmas" and it sort of implies that this will be a Christmas where everyone will have to deal with having less because the money simply isn't there.  It's a total misunderstanding of what frugal means.

Frugality simply means doing more with less.  It doesn't necessarily mean doing more with less because you have less.  In fact, you could be a billionaire and still embrace the ideal of frugality.  It doesn't mean being cheap either.  A frugal person would rather buy good quality merchandise, would rather put out the money than spend (or rather waste) money on something that is subpar.  Frugal people generally learn that you can find good quality merchandise second hand often for the same price as brand new, lesser quality stuff especially if you know where and when to look.

I think the confusion comes in when we start to look at voluntary versus necessary frugality.  Is "necessary frugality" an oxymoron of sorts?   If you need to be frugal, can it really be called frugal at all?   I think so but it brings up some interesting issues.

I am frugal by nature.  I don't like spending money when I don't have to.  I like to save up my money so that when I need it, it's there for me.  I like to save up my money so that I can buy good stuff because I don't really enjoy shopping.  But since the hubby is the sole breadwinner, being frugal, even though it's natural to me and I enjoy it generally, it's also a necessity.   We just couldn't swing this lifestyle if we spent money all willy-nilly.

What happens when frugality is a necessity though, is that sometimes it feels like a burden--no matter how innately you like to be diligent with your money.  You're holding on to your dollars and cents trying to make the wisest decision with your money.  You sometimes agonize over the best ways to make the money go farthest and you ruthlessly sort out your needs and your wants.  But then sometimes the line between needs and wants starts to get a little blurry.  This is when it gets difficult.  This is when it starts to feel like a burden, an annoyance and not a tried-and-true means to an end.  Of course, your financial goals are paramount in your mind but the goal is lofty and what you're wanting/needing now is so small (or not) in comparison.  You want to maybe throw caution to the wind (for a minute) and just get it already or do it already and have that satisfaction.  After all, there's only one life to live right?  Right.

Frugality, in general, is not about denying yourself simple pleasures in life.  But when frugality is driven by necessity, there's a lot less leeway in how much or which of these simple pleasures you can allow yourself because there's a lot more to lose.  And no matter how you look at it, sometimes you feel a little . . . annoyed?  Frustrated?  Exasperated?

Frugality, to me, is a discipline.  I know not everyone finds discipline enjoyable but I really do.  Sometimes people say I'm rigid and I know I can be but there's something comforting to me about being in control and not letting something else control me.  That's what being frugal means to me.  It means controlling my money so that my money doesn't control me.  Somedays, despite the frugality or maybe because of it, I will admit, it feels like money is running the show.  It dictates what I can and cannot do.

Still,  I kind of compare it to how a marathon runner approaches her race.  She knows that she has to eat and train a certain way to achieve the goal.  Now, that sweet potato pie at Thanksgiving may be really tempting but discipline dictates that she stay away.  But if that pie would give her great joy and pleasure, I don't think it a sin if she has a small slice.  Discipline says she stops there, though.  I may be way off with my comparison (marathon runners, feel free to chime in) but what I'm learning with frugality is that I  have to have some built in wiggle-room to my discipline so that I don't feel imprisoned or trapped by it.  So that I'm not rigid.

When I start to feel that way confined, I give myself one of those small things I've been wanting, realizing that it won't derail the whole frugality train.  One small thing crossed off a long list of needs and wants goes a long way to helping me re-focus on my financial goals while bolstering my spirits.

Holding your breath?

It's very plain to see (or at least I think it is) that right now people are hurting financially. The cost of things are going up when people are losing their jobs.  I can't say how grateful I am that the hubby has a (pretty) secure job in healthcare (though I don't have any illusions) and I can't even imagine the fortune I have had so that I was able to land a Saturday gig.

When I started the Saturday job, which is at a learning center, I thought to myself that this would be a great way to keep myself in the job market at least somewhat so that when I'm ready to return to work or go back to school for my doctorate, there's no huge gap in my resume.

But what I notice whenever I start to think of the future is that somewhere deep inside I hold back.  Of course, no one can predict what the future will be.  No one really knows what things will look like a few years from now.  But it can't be only me wondering when the shit is going to hit the fan.  Right now, it seems like so many folks are intensely invested in maintaining the status quo.  Business as usual--with a few very slight modifications to take into account the fact that their money is kind of funny right now.  But you'd have to be seriously delusional to not notice that it is most decidedly not business as usual.  The world is changing in ways we've never seen before.  They are calling this depression (which folks want to still misleadingly call a recession) the Greater Depression.  It will get a whole lot worse before it begins to get better.  And when it gets better, things will be a whole lot different.  Will Ph.Ds be relevant then?  What will a teacher's job look like?  How exactly do you plan when you don't know what you're planning for?

I don't spend money frivolously at all.  I weigh every penny I spend and struggle to stay within my budget.  I think to myself though that this may be the last time for a long time that I'll be able to get those silver earrings I've been looking at, those workout DVDs I've been wanting, so maybe I should just go on and get them.  Then I think to myself . . . in  a few years, will these things even be relevant?  Will I lose weight because I am not eating preferring to give the expensive food to the children while I survive on nuts, raisins, and topinambur (which was about the only thing we were able to grow in abundance this year)? Will I be looking to sell off my silver and gold to facilitate getting the hell out of dodge?

Is that kind of thinking pessimistic?  Or realistic?  And in my day to day dealings, should I be thinking about these things?  How do you go about in life not thinking about them?  How do you pretend that everything is exactly as it's always been (all this talk of recession is really just a hiccup right?  We'll be back in a minute!) when clearly, it's not.

You've read the articles about the "alarming" number of folks needing food stamps now.  What about when the government can't afford to subsidize the food stamp program?  You've heard of the folks who used to donate to food banks who are now accepting donations.  What about when the food banks can't afford to do what they do anymore?

So, yeah, I find myself holding my breath unconsciously sometimes.  You know, you plan your life out and dream about all the things you'd like to see happen.  But you don't hold on to those plans too tightly.  You let those dreams be fluid and loose and start to focus on the most basic of things that could keep you happy.  And alive.  You start to think about ways in which you can become more resilient and more versatile and more adaptable.

I think about my children and wonder about the kind of world they live in.  I just hope they can have childhoods, i.e. that the shit hits the fan after they are grown or something.  I know that's kind of selfish since there are other children coming up after them.  (And why the hell do I still want more kids if I know the condition of the world?)

The taxes where we live are too high and will get higher yet moving in this market is really not a possibility.  Like many folks out there, we'd have to sell to buy and quite frankly, ain't no one buying.  So we just go on paying our mortgage that has us by the gonads.  We are currently breaking even at the end of month even with strict budgets and accounting for every penny spent.  Yet, the list of things we need/want grows steadily--and we as parents struggle to do without, trying to give the kids a sense of abundance while cluing them in to the reality that for us and for many others, money is not growing on any trees.  So I'm determined to sock the money I make at this Saturday job away--tenaciously.  I know how easy it is once you're making money to spend money especially with kids, especially trying to give them all the things I didn't have as a child--like Christmas trees and such.  But my focus now is really and truly saving a good chunk of money while striking that delicate balance.  While avoiding feeling like I'm depriving my children and my self.  Having cash money can serve as good cushion to absorb whatever shocks we may be about to experience.

It strikes, me that this is also a good time to get my spiritual life in order too.  Again, shock absorption. Sure, I've been searching for my path but I am more motivated to focus on finding where I'm supposed to so that I'm there if or when the "just in case" situations happen.  So that I am there when the time comes to exhale.  And figure out what to do next.

The Frugal Fashionista?

Is that an oxymoron?

I'm willing to admit that for the last few years, I was not making an effort to look the best I could possibly look. There are a number of reasons but the main reason is that I was trying to be au naturel and also striving for modesty in my dress. Well, recently, I decided I was tired of looking frumpy, blah and old and decided to try to get my game back together. I stopped wearing sweats and workout clothes in public and started making a consistent effort to give myself a once over before I leave the house. It certainly helps my frame of mind and how I feel about myself.

If you read this blog though, you know that frugality has to be one of my top priorities in order for me to continue being a stay-at-home mom. Getting my game back, though, costs some money. I was trying to hook up my makeup game again. Even though I'm not a big makeup person, I realize a little foundation, lip gloss and eyebrow pencil can go a long way to giving you a polished look. But then I also realized I simply do not have $45 to drop on foundations and stuff. I was trying to revamp my wardrobe with some nice pieces. Now, believe me, I don't really shop other places besides the thrift store but I realized something else the other day while reading an excellent blog that I was recently introduced to: Wildflower. She advocates thinking really, really, really hard about every penny you spend and asking yourself, while looking through the lens of potentially difficult times fast approaching, the hard question: do I really need this ? And if you don't, you don't spend that money.

The thrift store is my slow money leak. I try to go on half-off days and all that but any good thrifter knows that the key to doing well at it is going often. So I go having the idea that I need a pair of nice fitting jeans or something. It's not that I don't have jeans but since my body proportions have changed, what I have doesn't fit quite right. I don't find what I was looking for but I do find 3 or 4 children's books, a cute purse, a nice shirt for one of the boys, or a lovely pair of shoes that would go with a particular blouse. I pay the $10 or whatever--it's great because I know that the stuff I have just purchased could easily be worth about $50.

But this is a slow money leak . . . I'm buying things I don't necessarily need. Just buying them because they're nice to have and more importantly, in relation to me upping my look game, it would be a nice addition to my wardrobe--something that would add pizzazz.

I could very well save that $10 or use it to pay for one of the childrens' activities.

But I also want to look cute. I want to accessorize and feel like I'm stepping out when I go out.

I've talked about this before but recently, it's come up again. So I'm asking myself again, how do I find the balance between being frugal and fashionable?

When I'm talking fashionable, don't get the wrong idea. I'm not a trendy person. I like classic looks with a hint of "what's in". And when I'm talking frugal, I'm talking about frugality with the goal of working toward financial security. I'm talking about saving enough money so that if an emergency hits, we can make moves. And even if no emergency ever happens, having financial security in our old age. Being fashionable is not an absolute necessity. I mean, , strictly speaking, neither is having high speed internet but the whole family uses the computer for entertainment, learning and business especially since we don't have cable. I'd say that things would have to be really hard before we got rid of the internet at home. A new pair of hoop earrings? Another bottle of nail polish? An eyebrow wax? I've thought of growing out my hair and getting it braided . . . These things make you feel nice and like a girl. Taken individually, they don't cost much. Frugality, in my mind, says wear the jewelry you have. Says you have enough nail polish. And no one but you notices your eyebrows.

You see, frugality in my mind has never meant being chic. It means being very practical. It means putting out $100 for a good pair of classic winter boots (which you bought at the end-of season clearance sale for $70). They might not match anything--no one would ever say you put together a cute outfit--but you'll be wearing those boots for years to come. Ah, but sometimes I'd rather pay $70 for the cheaply made boots that look oh so flyy with those jeans I managed to score. Is that irresponsible knowing what I know? Have I been tainted by American consumerism? Or is it the simple fact that I'm a woman and wearing cute stuff induces felicity? I'm constantly amused by those TJ Maxx commercials that talk about Maxxinistas . . . a play on the term fashionista and the newer term "frugalista". I mean, really, how important is fashion and being cute when it comes to survival and thriving in difficult times? Is it important at all?

So is it a necessity? Is your cuteness something you need? Something to really consider and take into account when you are trying to prepare for an uncertain future? It's a challenge weighing out those things that make you feel nice against the a very real reality: that the times are a changing and bank will make the change more manageable.

So, yes, I'm on the lookout for other slow money leaks but I've just identified one glaring one. Plug those small money leaks and you can easily sock away another 10%. The hubby's been saying that for years but I don't know, somehow it just clicked in a profound way the other day. Sometimes, someone else has to say it.

Do I plug the leak?

(((insert Z1's best whiney voice here)))But I don't want to!!!!

A little more money in the pocket, though, might just end up feeling better than being a frugal fashionista in the long run.

Gotta Love the Thrift Store

So today I dropped off two bags of clothes at the thrift store. Since it was half off day, I decided to run in and see if I could find a pair of corduroy pants. After a little searching, as luck would have it, not only did I find one pair, I found two pairs of size 12 corduroy pants by St. John's Bay. Both are cotton with a tiny bit of spandex which means that they fit fabulously. And they do fit rather nicely, I must say. One pair is dark brown and the other pair is a tan. Both of them together cost me about $8.00

Yay for a good thrifting day!!

I hope the person who gave these away lost weight and they didn't fit well anymore. And yay for the fact that I am solidly and officially a size 12 in most lines of clothing! Most of the clothes I gave away today are simply too big. And that's wonderful. :)

What do you wipe with . . .

as a cloth diaperer?

I thought to blog about this because as I was changing Z2 (he is very and I mean very regular today) I noticed that the wipes are getting really thin and worn and I do get asked this question a lot.

It just makes sense that if you're reusing the diapers, you could reuse the wipes. Once you're done cleaning up, you just toss the wipe in the diaper pail along with the diaper and they all get laundered together.

Any place that sells cloth diapers will also sell cloth wipes. My personal favorite place for cloth diapering supplies is Abby's Lane. There, you'll find a large selection of relatively inexpensive wipes. (It's also where I got my diaper sprayer and wet bag.)

But me, being the frugal mama that I am, didn't buy wipes. Nope. I tried a few things. First, I made my own wipe solution. I would fold up Bounty paper towels and then soak them with the wipe solution. But it was really hard to separate the wet paper towels (and I was getting tired of folding all those darn paper towels) so I put the solution in a spray bottle. When it was time for a diaper change, I'd spray the paper towels with the solution. That worked for a few months until I got tired of making the wipe solution. Then I would just wet up a paper towel with plain water under the faucet. That worked for a while until I realized that it was just plain wasteful to be using all those paper towels. But I didn't want to come out of pocket for some cloth wipes. So . . . I went to Costco and bought a heap of plain white washcloths for about $10.00. I kept half the stack for use as actual washcloths. I took what was left, got out a pair of sharp scissors and proceeded to cut each washcloth in half. There was some fraying but after about 2 or 3 washes, it wasn't an issue any more. If I had a serger, I could have eliminated the fraying with just a quick stitch up the side. Also in my collection of wipes are cut-up flannel receiving blankets (which frayed very little) and those baby washcloths that you usually get a whole bunch of at baby showers. So it's a mishmash collection of wipes that I have but they work well--far better than disposable wipes. It generally takes about three or four disposable wipes to do the job of one cloth wipe.

When we're out and about though, I do use disposable wipes. Earlier on, I used cloth wipes and had a peri bottle (which came with my birth kit) with water in it. I'd wet the wipe and get the job done. But it was messy and wet. So now on the go, I use Seventh Generation wipes . I get the refill packaging since that travels a whole lot better and is cheaper. Using disposable wipes only when we're out means that I buy wipes maybe 3 times a year. Since I don't use them much, I keep them in a Ziploc bag to help keep them wet. They're also good for cleaning up sticky messes that children are bound to make (think spitting out half-chewed raisins).

So basically, just like every other aspect of cloth diapering, there are many ways to do it. You could go super cheap and make your own or add a little luxury to the mix. If you cloth diaper, using cloth wipes just seems like the most sensible way to go.

Z2 is almost out of diapers now so I don't think I'll need to invest any more into diapering him--at least I hope not. But if I do, I'll be on the lookout for creative ways to save money while getting the job done.

Okay . . . I love thrifting . . .

Sorry if I'm beating ya'll over the head but I really do love thrifting. On that same thrifting excursion where I failed to get the set of 5# weights for $5.00, I did scoop up this little diddy: The Blomus Utilo/Tea Stick, great for an avid tea drinker like myself. On Amazon.com, it's going for $20.15. How much did your girl pay? $2.99. I almost feel redeemed. Almost.

If you're a thrifter . . .

Don't you hate when you see something in the thrift store (or yard/rummage sale) and *know* you should get it but convince yourself not to, saying that it's not priced low enough or you don't really need it? Only to get home and realize it was priced to sell. Quickly. And that you really do need it? Have you ever driven back in hopes that no one else saw it and you could pick it up? Only to find that it is long gone? And then grudgingly admit that you knew it would be?

Well, that was me. Thursday at the thrift store I saw a set of 5 pound hand weights/dumbbells for $5. I convinced myself that it wasn't really worth it especially since I could probably configure the hubby's free weights and come up with 5 pounds (he has the weight bar and weights that you can interchange). Well. I came up with 4.5 pounds. I came up with 6 pounds. But I just couldn't come up with 5 pounds. Dang it!!! Saturday, first chance I got, I was back at the thrift store hoping and praying.

Yeah, right!!!

So I just bought two 5-pound dumbbells from Target. For $6.99 EACH. Dang it!! At least I know that weights last forever. Little consolation. (((insert kicking self in butt smiley here)))

Funny.Ironic.

Just when I was getting down on my good old thrift store, it hooked a sista up! I got two flyy cotton blouses and one pair of 100% linen pants (size 12!!!! and not 14!!!!! and they fit perfectly!!!! although a little too long--nothing that's not easily fixed). The pants and one of the blouses make a complete outfit. Got Z1 a Gant hoodie and a Gap dress shirt too. Grand total: $10.91. I'm stoked! Like the universe knew I needed a pick me up.

Happy Thrifting!!!

A few months ago, I scored for $4.99 each, stone loaf pans by Pfaltzgraff. I think they retail for about $25 a piece. These pans bake beautiful loaves of yeasted breads and my banana nut, pumpkin and cranberry orange quick breads have such a lovely texture using these loaf pans.

Yesterday, for $5.99, a beautiful tea pot (with a built in) strainer made in Japan, The gentleman who was ringing me up said that two other folks had picked it up and then decided against buying it. I guess it was waiting for me!!

Happy thrifting indeed! :)