One of the biggest challenges in my decision to educate my children at home has been a lack of consistent community. Every so often, I get pretty obsessed with finding some kind of group for us to be a part of, some kind of regular social event to go to. Lately, this has been blowing up in my face. Either the kids we are hanging out with are too young or the kids' personalities don't mesh. I end up feeling disappointed and drained.
I decided to think about it again after one such not-so-great social interaction this past week with another homeschooling family. I talked to Z1 about it and found out that 1) he doesn't feel lonely at all and 2) he feels like he has enough friends. I wanted to ask him "What friends?" but from his perspective, he's good. So I can stop stressing about that. I can relax. But then I realized all this fanatical searching for community is not for my kids necessarily but for me. And it's something that has been lacking for me since before they even arrived on the scene. Same isht. Different Day. But more complex because I am educating my children at home which means I have precious little time for myself. I could join a knitting/crochet group, find a gym buddy, join a book club. But these things would have to occur at 5:00 AM and last until 7:00 AM so that I could get back to my children. Yeah, not happening. And trying to do these things with kids in tow is pretty impossible so I have to just accept that this is not the time.
So I keep dragging them to things they don't really care to go to and wanting them to interact with the kids so the other moms feel it's worth it to keep coming out and hang with us. But I'm changing my attitude about the whole thing and letting my children free up and do what they want to do at these get-togethers because I need the interaction. I'm still going to go but I don't really care if they hang out with the other kids or if they just decide to hole up in a corner and read.