This morning I was doing my 5.5.5 (which is more like 15.15.15 or 30.30.30 since I've been going to bed at the same time as the boys and getting up at 5:30AM). So in the post So What Connects Us? I was trying to sort out what connects Black people aside from the color of our skin (oh, and thanks to all who commented especially OG--good food for thought). I had concluded that nothing tangible does. That has been bothering me and occupying a lot of my mindspace for the past few days because even when I meet Black people whose views and/or experiences are the total opposite of mine, I still somehow feel connected in some way. I wanted to make sure that I wasn't imagining things, feeling something that really is not there! There's something there (even though I might really prefer to hang out with someone White who I can tangibly connect with).
So anyway, I was reading a book about Chakras (actually, The Book of Chakras by Ambika Wauters--review forthcoming)and there was an exercise there that asked me to rub my hands together and then hold them apart. I could feel the energy. It suddenly struck me . . . it's energy that holds us together. Like how my little Z2 automatically recognizes that another baby is a baby. How dogs know and (generally speaking) like to be around other dogs. Like knows like or like they say in the streets, "Game recognize game". I can go to a group for Black SAHMs and not really have all that much in common with everyone aside from being Black and and a SAHM. But I really enjoy being with the "sistas". It's a familiarity. A comfort. And something you can't quite pinpoint. And a good (valid) reason to stay a part of that group even if I also decide I'd like to join another, more racially mixed group of mothers who share my parenting styles, ideals, or life-situation.
So while I've completely gotten rid of the delusion that Blackness automatically confers some kind of tangible connection, i.e. that I should be able to find at least one thing I can connect with a Black person on aside from our Blackness, I'm happy to have realized that indeed, the energy of being Black, whether you like it or not, is indeed one heck of a strong connection.